Prague for Dummies

If you find this book, please, please, please send it my way.

After visiting CEELI, my new co-workers gave me directions to make it back to Uholicky, the small village I am living in outside of Prague. These directions included a tram, metro, bus, and train - and I thought, "hmm, I think I'd rather walk directly to the metro to get to the train." I like metros, I am comfortable with metros, metros are my friends.

On the way, I thought it would be brilliant to attempt to find an adapter, since mine fails to work with my laptop. About two and a half hours later, I found the one, and I mean it - I have since checked the internet - the ONE store that carries a universal adapter that will switch from American to European. I have decided to forgo any concept of public service and make my fortune selling these things to tourists on Charles Bridge, given that more than a few of them must also have forgotten/broken/lost their adapters and aren't as stupid as I am to try and trek around the city looking for ONE store (a store which, by the way, was located down a tiny staircase INSIDE a cosmetics store). But, I won, and I now have a very expensive adapter that I could have purchased in the US for $2.50. However, I have never cherished any possession quite as dearly, or been so proud of myself for finding it - speaking NO Czech whatsoever.

Then, it was off to the train. My new co-workers kindly told me which train to get on, but after checking the map about 25 times, I decided that they were wrong and got onto a different train. Yay! I was right and made it to Uholicky. By this point, I am feeling absolutely brilliant. After walking up the steepest hill in history, I found my hosts' house and again, patted myself on the back for my exceptional geography skills. I made it to the door, got out my key, and could not, no matter how many times I tried, get the door open. I tried every possible trick I could think of, but alas, no luck. My trusty new cell phone does not call out, so there was nothing I could do but wait for my hosts to return, which, luckily, they did. . .an hour later. Finding me sitting on the stoop, they questioned why I was sitting outside in the 48 degree weather. Expressing that my key doesn't work, they promptly showed me how to open the door (consisting of turning the key farther than the "stopping" point and pushing). They explained this to me about 4 times, arguing about better directions in Czech, so, all brilliance, pride, and self-esteem flew out the door in about 35 seconds.

So now, I am off to shower, drink a hot cup of tea, and fall into bed. Hopefully, I will feel smarter tomorrow.